Long time, no speak

Morning.

So I know, I know - I'm quite tardy for this one. And this one isn't even going to be one of my usual, tawdry posts. But worry not- your prude has not left! In the last six weeks I finished a thesis, traveled for some meetings and conferences, and hosted some familial guests for a time. Ergo, my blog took a back seat. Also, I learned that for me, writing 79 pages means when you see a blank page which has nothing to do with those 79 pages, you walk away and have a cocktail.

But today is a special day - today your sweet, innocent librarian turns 27!

So before I formally jump back in and tell you perverts of all the fun I've been having (and in the next few weeks move to a new domain!), I'm going to celebrate my birthday with a lovely little wish list. I'm 27 now and that means it's time to get down to business.

Ergo, this is what I want to make that happen. So for my birthday, I want...

1. Time to read. I know, nice work starting off on a rather uninteresting point, but it's true. I get the Economist every week and I can't remember the last time I took a morning off to conquer it. I will be fixing that. Any recommendations?

2. More group sex. Lots more group sex. I'm in the process of ending a couple of partnerships right now and so I'm trying to be more social as a result. Also, I haven't had a threesome with two men at the same time in about ten years and so I'd like to fix that, but that's a subset of this birthday wish. I want more group sex in general. I had a really phenomenal threesome the other day and I still get wet thinking about it. If anyone knows my penchant for getting wet and then casually putting my hand between my legs in public, the last two days have been me thinking about sucking his beautiful cock while fingering her lovely cunt in various spots around the city.

3. To find an apartment! I've been on the hunt for a place in the city, and apparently, New York real estate is a bitch. Who knew? I want something with windows... I've always had a fantasy of being fucked in a big, beautiful window while looking out onto the street.

4. This bikini.

5. More playful sex. While I absolutely love the rough stuff, I know I can get hit in the face. But it's not a regular occurrence (and it can't be, really). So in year 27, I'm excited to have more awesome sex for the express purpose of enjoying myself and getting off. Novel idea, right?

6. A great new creepy (serial killer? please? ) movie. I have wanted a decent one for so, so long and most just let me down. I would also settle for a really good Haunted House. After The Strangers, nothing has made me run up the stairs when all the lights are off.

7. More time to write. But that's just me working in support of my ever growing list of fantasies.

8. A new iPod. Mine just broke for good this morning, so it's less "wish list" item and more "Thing I have to suck it up and buy this week or else I'll never work out again."

9. To learn about wine. I really know nothing, and I'd like to be conversant at the very least.

10. To squirt! Outside of some errant experiences here and there, I've never been able to make it happen. I want to really focus on learning how to squirt. Practice, practice, practice...

So I've got a big year ahead of me!

And finally... if you've read this far, please consider (for my birthday!) making a donation to Women with a Vision. They're a brilliant organization making huge strides for marginalized women in New Orleans, and no one does what they do for women in the sex trade. They're innovative, thoughtful, and inspirational and last night someone broke into their offices and torched the place.