Last night, she said...

When I lay down, I usually pass out immediately. I'm always exhausted and must drag myself into bed on a nightly basis. I always prefer to be carried.
When I don't pass out, I fantasize.
Last night was hot as hell and I laid on my stomach, naked save a swath of pink lace across my ass, and struggled to get comfortable enough to sleep.
And laying there for long enough, my thoughts immediately went to you. I thought about what I wanted right now more than anything and it was easy.
I wanted to feel your cock pressing through the thin fabric against my ass. I wanted to feel it hardening against the lace and flesh. I wanted to feel the weight of your body coming down on top of mine, despite the heat, to push it harder against me.
I wanted to feel your mouth on my shoulder, biting down until I wince and whimper, the first noise of the night. I want to feel not just your incisors dig into my skin but all your teeth, individually and together, leaving what I know will be the most ingrained of marks.
I wanted to feel your hands wrap around my waist and pull me into you so that both of those feelings become conjoined, balancing and off setting each other.
I wanted to writhe against you, the faintest of struggles which only beg you to do everything harder, to exercise your control. To let me know that this is not my choice, this is your decision.
I wanted to feel your hand slide down into the front of my panties, curling themselves in to feel how wet I am. Your fingers would simply slide against my clit, feeling how soaking wet I am from you. You know how wet I get when you touch me slowly... when you bite... when you let me feel your hard cock that I will always beg for.
Your fingers slide lower to feel my cunt, feel how open and swollen it is, estimating how many fingers you can slide in effortlessly, and then thinking about adding one already so that it still hurts. You move your fingers up and down, rubbing my clit, feeling me get wetter and wetter underneath your palm. My hips push against your fingers as your mouth finds my neck again - that spot where my back and shoulder and neck all meet and I immediately begin to tingle over every nerve.
I moan louder and feel your other hand limply come across my mouth. I whimper into your hand, fingers spread and carelessly splayed over my lips.
And then you begin to fuck me. You push three fingers in, and while my cunt is slicked with my own juices, dripping down and forming a spot on the bed underneath me, it is still tight and I wince, pushing back into your cock as you push them inside to the base.
I cry out just enough for you to push them in deeper and whisper for me to breathe.
You begin to fuck me with your fingers, your cock still pressing against my ass. I breathe slowly, opening my legs just slightly and you slide in deeper.
I am rapt. I want to cum for you so badly so I buck my hips into your fingers. I am pushing hard into you and into the bed, my cum creating the wet spot on which I will have to sleep. My hands squeeze sheets tightly as I continue to fuck your fingers.
You whisper that I'm a good girl and I buck harder.
You bite my shoulder and I cry out, that much closer to cumming on your hand.
Your hand pulls down my panties and I feel their wetness in between my knees. Four fingers slide back inside me of me, stretching me until I fight, until you hold me tighter against you. Until I can feel your cock pressing against my ass.
I fuck your fingers, the head of your hard cock straining against my ass, making me catch my breath. Are you going to fuck me right now? With my cunt filled and my eyes shut?
But you hold your cock right there, letting me push back as much or as little as I want. You hold your cock steady and to give you what you want all I have to do is push back against it, and let your beautiful cock fill my ass. I tighten my pussy around your fingers, drenched in my juices, which slide effortlessly into me.
I want to be your good girl. I want to cum for you.
I push back.

Long time, no speak

Morning.

So I know, I know - I'm quite tardy for this one. And this one isn't even going to be one of my usual, tawdry posts. But worry not- your prude has not left! In the last six weeks I finished a thesis, traveled for some meetings and conferences, and hosted some familial guests for a time. Ergo, my blog took a back seat. Also, I learned that for me, writing 79 pages means when you see a blank page which has nothing to do with those 79 pages, you walk away and have a cocktail.

But today is a special day - today your sweet, innocent librarian turns 27!

So before I formally jump back in and tell you perverts of all the fun I've been having (and in the next few weeks move to a new domain!), I'm going to celebrate my birthday with a lovely little wish list. I'm 27 now and that means it's time to get down to business.

Ergo, this is what I want to make that happen. So for my birthday, I want...

1. Time to read. I know, nice work starting off on a rather uninteresting point, but it's true. I get the Economist every week and I can't remember the last time I took a morning off to conquer it. I will be fixing that. Any recommendations?

2. More group sex. Lots more group sex. I'm in the process of ending a couple of partnerships right now and so I'm trying to be more social as a result. Also, I haven't had a threesome with two men at the same time in about ten years and so I'd like to fix that, but that's a subset of this birthday wish. I want more group sex in general. I had a really phenomenal threesome the other day and I still get wet thinking about it. If anyone knows my penchant for getting wet and then casually putting my hand between my legs in public, the last two days have been me thinking about sucking his beautiful cock while fingering her lovely cunt in various spots around the city.

3. To find an apartment! I've been on the hunt for a place in the city, and apparently, New York real estate is a bitch. Who knew? I want something with windows... I've always had a fantasy of being fucked in a big, beautiful window while looking out onto the street.

4. This bikini.

5. More playful sex. While I absolutely love the rough stuff, I know I can get hit in the face. But it's not a regular occurrence (and it can't be, really). So in year 27, I'm excited to have more awesome sex for the express purpose of enjoying myself and getting off. Novel idea, right?

6. A great new creepy (serial killer? please? ) movie. I have wanted a decent one for so, so long and most just let me down. I would also settle for a really good Haunted House. After The Strangers, nothing has made me run up the stairs when all the lights are off.

7. More time to write. But that's just me working in support of my ever growing list of fantasies.

8. A new iPod. Mine just broke for good this morning, so it's less "wish list" item and more "Thing I have to suck it up and buy this week or else I'll never work out again."

9. To learn about wine. I really know nothing, and I'd like to be conversant at the very least.

10. To squirt! Outside of some errant experiences here and there, I've never been able to make it happen. I want to really focus on learning how to squirt. Practice, practice, practice...

So I've got a big year ahead of me!

And finally... if you've read this far, please consider (for my birthday!) making a donation to Women with a Vision. They're a brilliant organization making huge strides for marginalized women in New Orleans, and no one does what they do for women in the sex trade. They're innovative, thoughtful, and inspirational and last night someone broke into their offices and torched the place.